cute, funny, retarded, perverted, weird and generally entertaining things my students tell me on a daily basis.

Monday, February 13, 2012

Week of January 30th to February 2nd


4 classes back to back in the morning. That sucked. I showed up to school thinking I had 3 classes (like I was supposed to) but then saw (and remembered) that I had 4th period with Aoshima-sensei as well. FML. That killed my good mood right away. THEN the printer reaaaally seemed to have a death-wish cuz it kept fucking up my copies and I didn’t manage to finish printing everything on time and I was late for first period (1-7 with Aoshima, which DID NOT help my mood either) anyhow, all my classes were good though. Even class with 1-3 was sort of okay, and remember that girl who just refuses to do anything and play every single game and just stands there with that weird face like she’s trying to ignore the world around her. Well. That kid can draw as well as any professional manga artist. I made them “invent a super hero” in class and that’s the first time I’ve ever seen her do anything. huh.

So I had first year classes, and 3rd year sentaku classes, and this week, for sentaku, I am doing a lesson on the Spice Girls. Now, not only did I have huge fun planning this lesson, but it was very nostalgic for me, so I was really curious about how the kids were going to react to them. Well, I know 3-3 and 3-6 are both good groups, but they both loved it! Which made me so happy. In 3-6, that girl (I’m so bad I can’t remember her name…) who was pestering me about my boyfriend last week was at it again, insisting that I show her puri of my bf and also asking me a bunch of questions about make-up. It was really cute. I told her and her friend, after class, to come see me in the staffroom after lunch, and I would show them.

And sure enough, they dutifully showed up 5 minutes after the end-of-lunch bell and I grabbed my bag and went outside with them. We spent 20 minutes on the front steps of school, chatting and looking through my purikura (you’ve seen Samantha’s blog, right? there’s a LOT. lol). They kept going “moderu mitai!” (you look like a model!) and “iiii naaaa~ otona ni naritai!” (I wanna be an adult. being an adult must be so nice!) and I was like “kid, I wish I could switch with you!” and we laughed. It was actually, I think, one of the best moments in my 3 years at this school.


First period was 2-2. I decided to fuck all pretense of actually doing anything while Shigeki-sensei is lecturing, and brought some stuff to grade at the back of the class while he talked. Made class go much faster, and it’s gonna reduce the giant pile of things to check that’s been piling up on my desk recently. This is what happens when you give me days with 4 and 5 classes in a row, you stupid fucks… even when I do have the afternoon off, I’m too tired to do anything afterwards… but nevermind. 2-2 went well, with two funny occurrences. The first was that, when I asked for volunteers to demo my game, like 10 kids got out of their chairs (they’re not usually that eager) and the little posse of goody-brat-boys (composed of Toshiki 1 and 2, Tetchan and the other one… what’s his name… Koki :p) ruled supreme over the others who bowed down to their superiority and let them come play. The second thing was me going up to Atsuya, who looked tired and depressed and I asked “not genki today?” and he went “sagepoyo. Today, not agepoyo” in a kinda sad voice. lol!!! I was under the impression that “agepoyo” was a really gyaru thing? Maybe not, or maybe it’s mainstreaming, but Atsuya is this tiny goody-goody boy who doesn’t look badass for a minute, so it was just really funny for me to hear him say that :p  I guess I shouldn’t laugh cuz he was probably broken-hearted or something, but it was just such an odd occurrence!

2nd period was 2-1 and passed by quickly since I repeated the same “I’m grading papers” gimmick. I did spend a few moments teasing Wataru at the back, cuz I just can’t help it. He’s much too cute. When I have babies, they better all look like Wataru. When I asked for volunteers for my game demo, first, Rei stood up, and then nobody else. I was like “come on!” and then Masaki, this cute, shy little kid with a changing voice stood up and everyone went “eeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeehhh?!? Masaki?!” and laughed a bit, which I guess wasn’t super nice but he didn’t let it phase him and trotted up front while I bullied two more boys into joining us. He then did the demo like a pro. Huge props to that kid, he seems really shy, but he always tries so hard ^_-

Theeeeeen!!!! I found out that Mizushima-sensei is absent today! (I really shouldn’t be this happy about it since I heard it’s because someone in his family died….) so my class with 2-3 was moved! Which gives me a lovely break right now! yatta!! You know, it makes all the difference between a crappy 5 classes day and this… now I’m super looking forward to my next two classes. ^_^

4th period was with 3-2, and since Mizushima-sensei was absent, I had to do it on my own. Yabe-sensei showed up to check on things for about 20 minutes, then he left. But they were sooooo good. At the beginning of the class, I joked that they should be extra good since I was alone, but they really were! Not that I ever have any trouble with 3-2, but you know. Again, the reaction was pretty good, which made me happy. Nothing I can remember too much except that during the break before class, Ryohei from 3-5 was sitting at a desk in the back and going “hi” and I’m like “you’re not in this class” and he goes “what?! I am a member of sannen-ni-kumi (class 3-2)” and laughed. Then Dan showed up and pointed to him and said “he is good English ability” and I said “I know”. Ryohei nodded and said “yes” so I said “yeah!” and held my hand for a highfive and he slapped it, looking all chuffed. Dan was saying “me too. Good English, yes?” and I made a face at him and said “… so-so” which made Ryohei laugh.

Ah man, I really wish I wasn’t so tired…. class with 3-1 was really good, and Minami was priceless as usual, but I really can’t remember specifics… but actually, when I walked into class, a lot of students were really confused and saying things like “eh? we have sentaku now?!” and the best reaction goes to Kousuke who – when he realized that I wasn’t the one who was confused – clapped his hands together and let out a huge “YOSSSSSSSSSSSSH!!!” followed by something along the lines of “sentaku is sooo much better!” in Japanese, so I asked him what class he thought he had and (after much haggling to get my meaning across) he told me it was regular English. lol. Although I guess, grammar class with Hasegawa-sensei really CAN’T compare with my awesome lesson on the Spice Girls. lol.


This was another day where I was really busy and didn’t really have time to write anything down, so I forgot it… Nevermind that I was also REALLY tired… I do remember that I wanted to throttle Ryota (in 3-4) though, but what else is new? His thing today was that he kept repeating the word “chikubi” over and over… that means “nipples” in Japanese btw, and it was sooooo annoying… I basically realized that he was using it to mean “boobs” in the same way we’d say “tits” in English, I suppose, because we were doing the spice girls lesson and some of the pictures of the girls had plungeing necklines…. apparently Shun likes big boobs and Ryota and the others kept taunting him about it. When we had extra time at the end and I asked if they wanted to watch another video, Ryota shouted (in Japanese, of course) “YESS!!! Shun wants to see more tits!!” …. -_-


Not really in a great mood today, so classes were kind of a blur… I had my super-hero lesson with 1-6 and then 1-4 and it went fine, except that NOT ONE SINGLE KID in 1-4 knew who Sailor Moon was!!!! I mean I know it’s a bit old, but most of the kids in the other classes all knew who she was… minding blown. Also, I feel old.

4th period was 2-5 and they were perfect little troopers, as usual, and really into the pokemon game. Nothing really special happened. Sorry this was such a boring day :p

Some little ichinensei girls were following me around earlier and talking about me in Japanese, saying “Vanessa sensei is so fashionable! Look at her cute shu-shu!” which made me laugh… cuz, since when is a scrunchie fashionable?? But I guess if you compare me to the other teachers…

Also, I feel I should mention something : it is freakishly COLD here. Now, unless you have yourself worked as an ALT in Central Japan, you are probably not aware of this but, schools are NOT HEATED in the winter here. And not only that, but teachers are constantly opening all the windows, all over the school, because they believe that you need to “change the air” in order for the kids to not catch the flu. Ironically, there are way more sick kids here every winter than I’ve ever seen in Canada, and yet, when I mention this little fact to them, it flies right over their heads and they just go “WE MUST OPEN THE WINDOWS MORE!!!!” anyways… So my point is, it’s basically the same temperature inside school as it is outside. And these days, the temperature is hovering around or below zero, so you can imagine how fun that is!!

The only place in the school that is actually heated is the staffroom. It’s lucky for me, but incredibly stupid, I feel, because it’s like admitting that you DO need heat, but you’re too cheap to give it to the students. It just baffles me beyond belief. Heating the school is too expensive, and yet, they’re always shelling out tons of money for people to come and trim the trees on the school grounds and plant flowers, etc. How the heck does that make any sense?!?!

But anyways, I could go on for hours on this topic, so I’ll shut up now.

Have a good weekend!


  1. Thank you for your answer :)
    I think it sounds so inetresting I would love to know more about it!
    I'll just leave my e-mail here :)

  2. What a good idea for a blog! Your kiddies sound so cute haha.
    I have to say, the heating situation sounds a little ridiculous. Although during the winter at my uni, rooms are so hot you have to take off most of your clothes to survive. And then once you make it back outside again it feels twenty times colder. So maybe the whole no heating thing is good for maintaining acclimatization? lol
    Or maybe the cold helps them focus more.

    1. thank you! it always seemed to me like i was the only one entertained by my kiddies stupidity, but i guess not! yay!

      it IS ridiculous... i mean, the teachers have blankets in the staffroom, the kids are wandering around clutching little "hokkairo"s which are little packets of special stuff that warms up when you shake it... they're not allowed to wear gloves or scarves or anything... and no, it does NOT help them concentrate more! and in the summer it's the opposite, cuz it gets ridiculously hot in the summer in Japan, and it's actually worse in the summer cuz they are all dead on their desks and can't concentrate at all.

      i have stopped trying to fight it, because nobody listens to me, but it still annoys me. rational reasoning, you will find, is not really the Japanese's strong suit......

  3. back to back classes sound harsh! when do you find time to eat lunch? :( or you eat lunch the same time they do? and i've seen your purikura! they're so cute! you and your friend have such nice facial features D: i wantttttt

    1. 4 back to back classes is horrible. 2 is okay, 3 is doable, but 4 is just evil. of course, there is a lunch time for the kids, and i eat at the same time. thank god!! also, i eat in the staffroom... thank god they don't make me have lunch with the kids anymore... i used to have to a couple of times a week, and it pretty much always suck because instead of sitting me with the kids who wanted to talk to me, they would always sit me where there was an empty desk, which was inevitably with a bunch of quiet kids who knew zero english :/ when my supervisor changed this year, i never mentioned anything about "lunch with the kids" to the new one, and she never suggested it. thank god!

      aww, and thanks! well, purikura DOES make you look hotter, you know :p although are you one of those "i want a small head" people? cuz i do have a really small head and people are always fawning over it here... lol! it's weird.

  4. No heating! God, how cruel is that! How is anyone supposed to study with a frozen brain?! O.O
    How can the kiddos not know Sailor Moon? It's the best thing! Look at this great techno-opening in German. Best thing evar! And this is the actual version they showed on TV. :-D Needless to say I loved this as a child. Ths kids are missing out on so many great things. :-P